Pink Sauce

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I find myself in a strange, mildly depressive but also angry mood at the moment without even really knowing what triggered it. Some would say: typical attitude from a homosexual: enjoyment without responsibility! My guess is this mood is due to a compound of an underachiever's complex and the fact that my body keeps on reminding me of my age. The underachiever's complex is nothing new and is of course driven by some deluded (and apparently wide-spread) impression that life owes one something; which of course it doesn't (I blame the parents!). I am almost 31 and nothing to show for it. I have a Master's degree level of education and yet find myself being paid way below the average London salary (which is £30,984 according to the Guardian while Visit London breaks it down to about £21k pa for manual jobs and £42k pa for non manual jobs). This would be sort of ok if I liked what I do but I have one of the most boring jobs on earth (the sort where you are asked to leave y...

This is simply outrageous! The Catholic Church, this self-appointed pillar of morality against the so-called "culture of death" pandering to the celebrity worship culture. Beatification and Canonisation are normally very lengthy processes , which can take decades. Miracles are required. At a time when the catholic Church is finally starting to be called into account and has this huge image crisis, they suddenly decided to yield to public demand (John Paul II actually said that the Church was/is not a democracy!!!) and give this already highly mediatic pope the highest proof of stardom they can come up with. In my mind they are simply trying to capitalise on the wave of sympathy created by the death of the previous pope before it cools off. Petty!

My Friend the Designer (I will call him MFD from now on, I think) is not happy. He read yesterday's post and he thinks I should not describe myself as having a "lanky frame and eagle-like physiognomy". He says I should go for "squid-like" instead! Private joke apart, he believes I am too hard on myself and that I am neither lanky or burdened with an aquiline noise. I say he needs glasses! We discussed all this yesterday evening and we quickly launched into a discussion on the mechanics of brief encounters. It is very much springtime for MFD at the moment and he is feeling full power of that vivifying sap flowing through his veins. In short he has been a bit of a tart (with a bike, not with a cart. Sorry, another private joke) for that past month or so (and he won't thank me for this...). Now, it is all very well to be feeling this way but it takes (at least) two to alleviate the itch. My theory (which I explained to him) is that there are three basic criter...

This morning I had an email in my inbox from someone who saw my Gaydar profile and apparently liked what they saw. I have had this profile for about four years now and in all that time have met only a couple of people through it. In all cases nothing that went much further than an initial rendez-vous and a few emails. And although the profile is active, I have not used it for ages. On the profile visitors can find a picture of a giant frog sculpture taken at Sydney airport and a couple of pictures of Super Dupont with the caption: "Ugly toad or French super hero?". The sheer amount of members on the site coupled with the fact that I hardly ever log in, mean that nobody usually looks at my profile. It was therefore rather a surprise to receive this email, especially when it contained such undying line as: "I vote sexy french super hero.You are one hot stud." Ok, I admit, this does feel rather nice. BUT! "Sexy" I have been called before (although I am not...

I have just received the following email from my Reading Group's website. Please support the International Day Against Homophobia by signing the petition on www.petitiononline.com/idaho . Please pass this information to anyone you think may be interested. Thank you, Derek Lennard. International Day Against Homophobia. I have to admit I am a little weary of the fact that they have decide to go for something negative (ie against homophobia) rather than in support of something positive but since every little helps and since my point of view is probably only that of a Londoner who is lucky enough to have very little contact with homophobic behavour, I would like to invite to both sign the petition and pass the link to your contacts. Thanks.

Read the first part of this post. Saturday 07 May (afternoon) I am in the Tunnel, on the Eurostar again, on the journey back to London. The week has gone quite quickly but I am eager to be home. It will be five years in July that I have left France and I am starting to feel really disconnected with France. I was more interested with the results of the general elections than with what was happening on the news in France. In my first few years in the UK, I tended to try and dissociate myself as much as possible from all things French; this trip has shown me that I have perhaps grown more relax in this respect. Perhaps this is due to my being actually more remote than I have ever been. On the whole I am quite pleased to have been there during the past week and I enjoyed Dijon particularly, which (as I was well aware but perhaps refused to acknowledge too loudly) is a charming little city. Of course it will never compete with London for me and I am more sure than ever that I would not be ...

It is all shrunk! Or have I grown again? It wasn’t like that last year. When I walked into my parent’s kitchen, back in France, last Sunday afternoon, it was not the right size; not the size I remembered it anyway. The rest of the house seemed more or less fine though. I felt like Gulliver in Lilliput. And a rather strange journey it had been too. The train journey to Paris had gone fine and is not really worth dwelling upon. Soon after departure, I had open my laptop and switching on I-tunes had started to read the script of the next Chorus’ show in details. I am now (since the elections ) in charge of promoting the thing and I have worries about its content and the appeal it will have to the wider audience we need to fill the venue three times (that’s 2400 people to attract). Anyway, I felt really chuffed to be able to use my laptop on the train and to be able to listen to my music. I-tune, by turning my PC into this jukebox, has given me new appreciation of my music. Sounding like a...

Being one of them bloody foreigners, I will not be able to vote at this election and it is a damn shame, believe me! However, I have taken the test. The results are as expectedreally. Go Charles, go! Who should I vote for? Your expected outcome: Liberal Democrat Your actual outcome: Labour 16 Conservative -21 Liberal Democrat 66 UK Independence Party -32 Green 40 You should vote: Liberal Democrat The LibDems take a strong stand against tax cuts and a strong one in favour of public services: they would make long-term residential care for the elderly free across the UK, and scrap university tuition fees. They are in favour of a ban on smoking in public places, but would relax laws on cannabis. They propose to change vehicle taxation to be based on usage rather than ownership. Take the test at Who Should You Vote For

What a busy week! Four of my evenings this weeks are taken up by the Chorus. On Sunday evening, was a production meeting for the next show. On monday, we had rehearsal as usual and last night was the first meeting of the Steering Committee. It was quite interesting and I have to say I was quite favorably impressed by the new chair; both his ideas and the effecient way in which he seems to be conducting things. Let's hope this will be a lasting impression. On Thursday, is the first meeting of my very own committee and people are already dropping like flies! I have already received 5 apologies (out of the 18 people on the mailing list!). Let's hope this is not a comment on my election but rather on the fact that everything was decided at the last minute. I can't really wait to get going. This is promising to be very interesting work, especially if we manage to avoid the sort of drama I have witnessed recently. Tonight I have the night off and will try and make it to the gym b...

In this time of Papal upheaval, I thought it would be interesting to bring The Prophecies of Saint Malachy into the debate. Just for fun and to muddle things that tinny wee bit more. :O)

On Saturday I was toiling away in a dusty basement but on Sunday I was (almost) rubbing shoulder with the elite at the V&A . I work for the legal services of one of London's councils. Our organisation is one of the few among the London Boroughs' to have been granted the Law Society's LEXCEL accreditation. This was two years ago. Now, each year, Legal Services are submitted to an assessment to make sure that we still comply with the LEXCEL Standards. This is usually the occasion for some furious catching up by many people to make sure that everything they failed to do during the year looks like it has been done regularly after all. To be honest, we should have assessments every month to keep the service running as it should! Anyway, last week, my former manager, in a different position from the one I currently hold in this place, pleaded with me to help her sort out some of the archived files in the basement. I used to be in charge of that and she claims I am the only o...

Looks like I am now responsible for the image of the London Gay Men's Chorus. I did get elected last night and although it was not the landslide that other candidates enjoyed, the margin was comfortable enough. That was the easy bit though, it seems. This morning (the one after the night before), I already got sent back to my basket by members of the Committee who basically told me that they were the professionals and I knew nothing so I'd better shut up. This is technically true but I certainly feel that I was making a valid point (I had the support in this of another professional not involved with the Committee) and they did not raise any argument that convinced me of the contrary. I guess this will be my major problem in this position: my lack of legitimacy in holding it. People seem very timorous in the way they approach the Committee activities or is it just me being too earger and therefore not considering things enough? But hey! I asked for all this, didn't I? :O)

And what a choice it is!!! Benedict XVI aka Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, a 78 year old german, is renowned for his rigid orthodoxy, making him once of the worst possible choices for those hoping that the Catholic Church would turn to a more liberal and open minded attitude. In addition to the fact that once again the "third world" (the most important congregation of the Catholic Church) is not represented, the chosen Pope is also clearly homophobe. Here is what Outrage! have to say: In 1986, Cardinal Ratzinger wrote the infamous Letter to the Bishops of the Catholic Church on the Pastoral Care of Homosexual Persons. Ratzinger wrote that a homosexual orientation, even if the person is totally celibate, is a "tendency" toward an "intrinsic moral evil". Moreover, a homosexual inclination is both an "objective disorder" and a "moral disorder", which is "contrary to the creative wisdom of God". "Special concern and pastoral at...

In 1995, I think, I was elected as a member of the Town Council of my parents' village. I was asked by the mayor if I was interested and basically only had to say yes for it to happen as I was very much elected on my father's good name and reputation. I did not get to do much there, either. I was very junior with no real skills to share and the council's role was more to agree to the mayor's decisions than anything else. Not a very satisfying experience. When I left for this country, I had come to the conclusion that I was usurping someone else's place on that council who could perhaps have done more than I did. Two weeks ago, I made my first ever "political" speech. By a decision I am more and more starting to question, I was standing for the position of Chair of the Marketing, PR and Merchandising Committee of the London Gay Men's Chorus . I have never really had any dealings with the Committee other than the odd suggestion and the designing of the p...

With the General elections looming, the Tories trying to drum up poeple's xenophobias and Labour, seemingly following suit, not doing much to raise the debate by producing a different discourse on the subject, I thought these two articles from the Journal of The Royal Society for the encouragement of Arts, Manufactures & Commerce were very much worth reading. Welcome Opportunity Uk Immigration policy increasingly focuses on exclusion rather than inclusion. According to Satvinder Juss, however, migrant workers should be recognised as a vital economic and social resource for our society. Get Wise: The Value of Diversity As the Uk population gets older and more diverse, employers will have to think proactively about how to remain competitive in the international market.

Read the first part of this post. I was going to carry from where I left but I think I will just ask people to go and read this fantastic article by Polly Toynbee in the Guardian, which says what I still had to say so much better than I could put it. (thanks to Submit Response for this.) Finally a bit of comic relief with The Pope's Message From Hell and Saint Pope John Paul George Ringo II . Update - 13 April 2005 One wish this was comic relief too but unfortunately it is not.

It has not been the best of weeks for prominent octogenarians. After Pope John Paul II (84), it is the turn of Prince Rainier (81) and Saul Bellow (89) to go eat the dandelions by the roots (as they sometimes say in France). It is a sad thing when someone dies but at the same time nothing unusual or unexpected when people get to that age. Still the media are a-buzz with the shocking news when each day millions of other people die in resounding silence of far less natural causes than old age. As is always the case, too, in those circumstances, the departed are praised to high heaven for all the wonderfully good things they did in their life, while the bad things (they are humans after all) are quickly swept under the carpet. In Rainier's and Bellow's cases the praises, because limited mostly to their work and public personas, are probably quite reasonably given and deserved. Rainier did turn the fate of his small principality and Bellow (whom I must confess I had never heard ...

You will remember my frustration at trying to get any information from the dreaded French administration as to how to get a duplicate copy of my driving licence. In the end I came to the conclusion that I would have to just go there and ask them directly. With this in mind, I had taken today off and this morning got up an hour earlier than usual, got into a bus and faced one of the coldest days we have had for a while to queue in front of the French consulat. I got there a good half hour before opening time and there were already about 20 people shivering in the wind and drizzle. Finally, they opened the door and I got admitted unto this little bit of French soil. After a cursory search of my bag by a gendarme, I got to the reception desk where I explained my situation. The officer in front of me explained that I would have to make a declaration of loss with the consulat, send this to France to the prefecture which delivered my licence originaly to get some document or other from them...