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The Touch Typed Diary - Career

Some background to what follows can be found here. Other installments are here.

I started this as a way to train at touch typing (hence the title) which I have finally taken up learning more or less seriously. At first I was typing what nonsense came across my mind and deleted it once I had finished. Gradually, it just turned into a diary relating the events (not very numerous) of my life. This has also the advantage of keeping me relatively busy at work when I have nothing else to do which seem to happen rather frequently these days.

01 February 2002

Is this really the First of February Two Thousand and Two???

I remember when I was younger, I used to compute how old I would be in the year 2000 and imagine what I would be doing then. It all seemed soooo far away. This year I will be 28 and as much as I used to like the idea of growing up and getting older, the figures on the paper now seem to have run along too quick and not to be related with me and who I am. I feel like I am still 22 or 23.

Although things have changes immensely since I was that age, I feel that my situation in life is still as precarious. No stable job or financial security of any kind. And like then, I still do not know what I will be doing, what my life will be like in a couple of months from now. Oh, well, I should just get used to this state of things, take it in my stride and make the best of it.

Talking of which, I have decided to spend a bit more of the little money I earn on myself. Yesterday I saw an ad in Hot Ticket for Romeo and Juliet at the Royal Opera House. The ballet; I assume the music will be Prokofiev’s, though the ad did not state this, strangely enough. I will go and see that. I also want to go and see something with molly and clap and house in the title, I can not remember the exact title just now, I am afraid, but it is supposed to be quite good and has been running for some time already. GSJ and me had talked about going together at the time…

There is no point in saving such small amounts of money as I do just now and at the same time let life pass me by. I have been doing this for too long and I can see it is not leading me very far, except to being a miserable, sad git. There will always be time to save when I get a better-paid job, which hopefully will be soon now.

I am actually growing slightly restless on this issue. I feel, perhaps wrongly that I can do much more and better than what I am currently doing, and I just can not wait for it to happen. I have been waiting for quite some time already. It is a waste.

Anyway I am going to stick where I am just now. They seem to be quite happy with my work performance and as this Best Value review thingy moves on, there might be contracts for grab… If not, I think the agency will not take much to find me something else, in the worst of cases, I can always stick with temping a little longer.

Hopefully, CGBureau will finally come up with something. As I said earlier, there is no more certitude in my miserable life than there used to be. This, I am convinced, does not help me to grow (let alone grow up!). To be in a comparatively crap job, definitely badly paid, does not make you feel good about yourself, does it?

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