Skip to main content

The Touch Typed Diary - Moaning

Some background to what follows can be found here. Other installments are here.

I started this as a way to train at touch typing (hence the title) which I have finally taken up learning more or less seriously. At first I was typing what nonsense came across my mind and deleted it once I had finished. Gradually, it just turned into a diary relating the events (not very numerous) of my life. This has also the advantage of keeping me relatively busy at work when I have nothing else to do which seem to happen rather frequently these days.

22 January 2002

I am tired, hungry and lonely and, yes, I like to moan! And so what? Nobody is here to suffer from all this moaning so I can not see why I should not carry on like this to my heart’s content. I know it is very bad but I am not getting any more patient these days. Be careful, I am just about to start moaning again!!! I suppose this all comes from the fact that I have so little to be satisfied with in this bloody life of mine. Hopefully, my improved typing speed and the experience I will have gained from this place will allow me to find a real job for once with something to do. Another thing is the fact that they asked me to go to this meeting yesterday. I think there are two possible explanations for this:
First they need to show that the section is committed to the Best Value thingy and that is obviously no good to me.
On the other hand this might be a sign that they really like the way I do my job (when I have something to do, that is) and they have plans for me. I.e. they are considering keeping me here and offer me a real position and a contract. One can dream, can’t one?
I think that, as usual, a good way to alleviate some of the strain I feel in my miserable little life just now would be for me to get more money and also perhaps more things to do when I am at work. More things to do as it would simply make me feel better about myself and money because I would then be able to spend it and do some retail therapy… Anyway I have not heard from the agency that sent my CV for job the other week which means: not now; you still have to wait honey!
I am bored with waiting I have to say; I have been waiting for so many years now. I more and more feel like I have been wasting my life and still am. The major problem then being that I am so used to be passive and to wait for things to happen that I do not really know where to start to stop this vicious circle.
Yesterday at the rehearsal, this guy said that it was a question of meeting the right people and I know that to a certain extent it is true and finding a job is definitely a question of luck, but where and how to meet the right people ? It seems especially complicated for someone like me who is sooooo crap at meeting people.
Anyway I think I should really make the effort of going to this Christmas party on Saturday; it will probably be boring as hell and I will end up in a corner like a plant, as usual but if I do not make some sort of effort, I will get nowhere that’s for sure. At least I would have tried. I will probably not stay long anyway, as people seem to be getting drunk fairly quickly!!!!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A Short History of the Elephant and Castle and Its Name

Last night I attended a lecture by local historian Stephen Humphrey who discussed the general history of the Elephant & Castle, focussing more particularly on what he called its heyday (between 1850 and 1940). This is part of a week-long art project ( The Elephant Project ) hosted in an empty unit on the first floor of the infamous shopping centre, aiming to chart some of the changes currently happening to the area. When an historian starts talking about the Elephant and Castle, there is one subject he can not possibly avoid, even if he wanted to. Indeed my unsuspecting announcement on Facebook that I was attending such talk prompted a few people to ask the dreaded question: Where does the name of the area come from, for realz? Panoramic view of the Elephant and Castle around 1960/61. Those of us less badly informed than the rest have long discarded the theory that the name comes from the linguistic deformation of "Infanta de Castille", a name which would have become at...

pink sauce | life, with a pink seasoning

As of tonight, my blog Aimless Ramblings of Zefrog , that "place where I can vent my frustration, express ideas and generally open my big gob without bothering too many people" which will be 6 in a couple of months, becomes Pink Sauce . While the URLs zefrog.blogspot.com and www.zefrog.eu are still valid to access this page, the main URL now becomes www.pinksauce.co.uk. There is a vague plan to create a proper website for www.zefrog.eu to which the blog would be linked. Why Pink Sauce , you may ask. It is both simple and complicated. For several years, I have grown out of love for the name of the blog. It felt a bit cumbersome and clumsy. That said, I never really looked into changing it, seriously. Tonight, for dinner, I had pasta with a special pink sauce of my concoction ; single cream and ketchup. I know most people while feel nauseous at the very though of the mixture but trust me, it's gorgeous. Don't knock it till you've tried it. After having had my platte...

Tick, Tick... BOOM! - review

Tick, Tick... BOOM! (by and on Netflix), titled after one of its hero's musicals, is the film directorial debut of Lin-Manuel Miranda, the acclaimed creator of Hamilton . Perhaps appropriately, it is about musical theatre and, itself, turns into a musical; covering the few days, in early 1990, leading to star-crossed composer Jonathan Larson's 30 birthday.  At that time, Larson, who went on to write Rent , was in the throes of completing his first musical, on which he had been working for eight years, before a crucial showcase in front major players in the industry. With social puritanism and the AIDS epidemic as background – with close friends getting infected, or sick; some of them dying, Larson, a straight man, struggles to write a final key song for his show, while confronting existential questions about creativity, his life choices, and his priorities. The film features numerous examples of Larson's work meshed into the narrative of those few days. Some are part o...